A Letter To My Future Self - Lets go to Rio de Janeiro 2016 Olympics

My dearest 33, 34, 35 and 36 year old me,

I know we are facing a difficult task ahead. Imagine dreaming of watching an Olympics is quite an expensive dream for someone from a 3rd world country living in a paycheck to paycheck basis.

But this dream is something that I want to fulfill by Rio de Janeiro 2016 Olympics.
I think this is the most feasible time to do it.

Firstly, Filipino tourists are not required to apply for a special visa to enter Brazil . This at least lessen the daunting task of preparing to tour or visit a country outside ASEAN region.

Second, the weather will not be a hinder. For the past, I observed that my body cannot take too cold temperature. Anything that is too cold that touches my body, will cause some reactions that I have to take celestamine to fight it. I haven't seen a doctor about it though.

Here are some of the major task we have to do:

Money Matters

1) Save up money for plane ticket - USD 5,000.00 Timeline: Sept 2012 - Aug 2015.
2) Save up money for board and lodging at least USD 3,000.00
3) Save up money for other expenses at least USD 2,000.00

For money matters, research earlier-on for discounts or any promos with regards to the Olympics. Take advantage of marketing promotions by companies who ties-up with the Olympics 2016. Check hotels/motel earlier and try to befriend with them to negotiate a more reasonable rates. Sincerity is important in any negotiations. For the past 32 years, I realized that there are lots of people who are willing to help you in every way they could as long as you ask and you are sincere in asking.

Physical Condition

As I don't have an athletic body, I must persevere to at least be stay healthy. Going to an Olympic event specially in a tight budget would take an added physical push. Why take taxi if you can save by walking?

Also, I don't have an idea yet how the event will be done and where each sport will be located, so it will be the best idea to be physically fit to endure any physical task.

Spiritual and Mental Preparedness

As I always believe, God won't bring me, where his grace can't reach me. This dream of mine is always at the back of my mind since I was young. And it's like a light bulb that suddenly came into my head this year after watching London 2012 Olympics.

Last August 30,2012 while doing my morning walk, I was praying( literally looking up to the sky while there is an airplane and talking to God how will I do this) and when I went back to my room for breakfast and online mass, for some reason a Brazilian or Portugese priest (i'm not sure of this nationality) Fr. Cristiano Barbosa was the one celebrating the mass. After that, I had the strong feeling that my dream was already blessed by God and must go ahead and pursue it.

I really wish I have someone with me. My mother, my two brothers and if God will blessed me more, I have my loving husband with me (hmmm... i think having a husband should be in a separate prayer, LOL).

Athletes I believe are thru example of God's gift. There physical attributes and character to persevere and be determined to be the best of themselves are definitely a grace from above.

All of us can dream but very few like these Olympians are determine to follow and fulfill their dreams. And with this, I want to personally watch, support and appreciate these people who fight to follow and fulfill their dreams.

With the above, it will be a challenge, for sure many will laugh and many eyebrows will raise. Do not fret, do not loose hope, and do not give up.

For sure there will be discouragements along the way, see this as a challenge on how to further reach for it. Never give up on this dream.

Live for Passion. Let the 36 year old me be in Rio de Janeiro 2016 Olympics.

Yours truly,

32 year old me

Hey Mr. Cap...

Oh how I wish to be closer to Mr. Cap...
He is like a mystery waiting to be unfold.

A faint smile from his lips will shatter your walls.
You will give in,though he is not willing to give more.

All I can do is sigh and dream from a afar.
Imagining what it would be, with me on his side.

His blue eyes sparkles, and his laughter is addicting.
His passion for his work will inspire you to keep going.

Crazy you might call me, crazy as it may seem.
Is there reason our path crosses, or am I imagining things?

I want to know what is on his great mind. I want to read his soul.
Is this is another joke of destiny? I will try not to get hurt.

Never worry as I don't expect and demand anything in return.
But I beg you don't laugh at me as this is something that had grown.

Vast oceans and lands separate us from one another.
Different culture and beliefs can't make us see eye to eye.

How this will end? I do not know.
Should I stop? Please tell me so.

Saturday

In my mind I won’t forget
The pain in your eyes which I detest
To touch is all I can do.
I hate it when I can’t comfort you.

Seeing blood runs thru the tubes.
I’m so scared I will lose you soon.
Every minute passes is like a ticking bomb.
Hearing your cries makes me want to die.

Anxiety fills my troubled heart.
Tears pooled in my swollen eyes.
Everything is blurry and uncertain.
I asked, God, why papa has to carry this burden?

Like a bolt of lightning struck my core.
How dare me to question what is in-store?
Who am I to insist what I want?
I kept praying and convincing myself, Thy will be done.

I beg for you to bring him back to us.
I beg for you to take away his pain.
You answered by taking away his life.
You bring him back to Father in heaven where there is no pain.

I miss him so much, it hurts.
Knowing he’s with you, that’s what matters most.
Life on earth is a gift from up above.
Death commences our great life in heaven and beyond.

frajoma

Papa

(+)Mr. Nicanor Salvante Saminal
October 19, 1950 - October 18, 2011

Life is full of struggles and imperfection.

It is good to know that we have you to lean on.

In times we fear the night and confused in sorrow.

You insist not to worry because there will be tomorrow.

During those times that luck and fate would turn against you.

I can feel your pain and shame, in your own way you just prayed.

And Papa you never gave up, you stood up, and fought,

In Shallah you utter, your faith is your best treasure.

Your strong faith is what we admire,

We are so lucky to witness it with our own eyes.

Daily dose of wisdom you share, reminding us to persevere,

to persist, and yet be gentle and to care.

Your love for music gives joy to our hearts,

And the sound of your laughter comforts our soul.

Your loyalty to the woman you married is inspiring.

We will take care of Mama who is our angel without wings.

Oh not to forget those sturdy hands that cradle,

Sturdy hands that grip and make us feel secure.

Everything will just be a memory now.

You have served your purpose and went back to our Creator.

Your unconditional love will be in our hearts forever.

In our hearts, we will never forget,

WE ARE WHO WE ARE,

BECAUSE WE GOT THE BEST FATHER THAT YOU ARE!!! (frajoma)

WYD 2013 Rio de Janeiro - In My Heart

Go and make disciples of all peoples (Matthew 28:19)
Theme for WYD in Rio de Janeiro - July 21-29, 2013


Wow! It's been awhile seen the last time I posted a blog. And most of the time I post a new poem, surely, I was inspired by something challenging in life.

Lately, I had been in chaos of how I will deal with my work, with my life. Not sure if this is the mid life crisis they call, but definitely, there are things that I cannot understand. But at least there is one thing that I am very sure of, I only find peace when I am focus with God.

After 16 years, I had stumble upon a chance to again, ignite my Catholic faith. I may not be youth anymore but I believe this will help me to keep my Catholic faith stronger and most importantly to be closer to God.

WYD 2013 Rio de Janeiro - In my heart.

For today I had checked the Visa requirement for Philippine passport holders, and I saw the we are Exempted from Tourist visa, wow, thank God for this. Now, I need to check the expenses and where I will get my funds....hahaha... God if you want this, I can do this...

visa - http://www.brazilsf.org/visa_by_country.htm

A Wreak

In frantic pace I circle.
Blinded by fear and confusion.
Longing for serendipity to transcend.
Unknown emotion creeping my head.

Loathing is an unbearable sorrow.
Keeps you down and see's no tomorrow.
Trying to break free from this shackle.
A nomad in my own body and soul.

Like a magnet pulling me closer.
To this unseen reality of life.
Life a rage of unstoppable waves.
Crushing through the walls of lies.

The ray of the sun stings the eyes.
Long time in the darkness I thought I had died.
Mist of the morning dew refreshes the faith.
Yearning to be freed in the living casket.

The Song

Then there was a song.
A lullaby sang by angels.
Cradle baby to sleep.
Soothes the soul of the lost.

A symphony that shatters the barriers
of young, old and the dead.
The melody continues to flow
weaving the travesty into reality.

Life is a music.
Life is a song.
So many choices, so many voices.
Let it not deter and confuse you.